THE GIRL FROM THE NAKED EYE
Archstone Entertainment, Rated R
1 star
With a lot more that’s naked in this movie than just the eye of the title, The Girl From The Naked Eye is a strange, sultry stew of mixed martial arts and cartoonish call girl noir. And with a bargain basement seedy production setup that oddly enough, just happens to suit its menacing downtown stripper dive aura just fine.
Prowling about the perpetually nighttime neon mean streets is Jake (action star and co-writer Jason Yee), a driver for a shady mobster. Jake just lost his employer’s fancy designer car as reckless stakes in a card game, and is indebted to pay him back big time at essentially what is now slave wages.
Assigned to chauffeur a stable of Naked Eye pole dancers moonlighting as hookers around town to their designated escorts for Naked Eye strip club owner Simon (action choreographer Ron Yuen), Jake becomes both infatuated and protective of one of the females, clearly underage teen call girl Sandy (Samantha Streets). Which makes his lust for the tempting jail bait complicated, to say the least.
Sandy in any case, is somewhat the opposite side of the same coin as the simultaneously in theaters Rock Of Ages vulnerable young rube played by Julianne Hough, minus the lung power. Hey, there is an economic crisis on tap right now, but aren’t there any jobs left at all—on or off screen— for girls not having to hawk their bodies?
There is a fair amount of spicy staccato noir dialogue coursing through the film, along with an overabundance of hookers with hearts of gold. Unless you’re talking porn queen Sasha Grey, who seems to relish her radically kinky role as wicked sexpot and Simon’s top concubine, favoring give and take exceedingly rough sex and dirty gym socks. Along with an upscale nightclub harlot, relatively speaking, played by all grown up now Lolita’s Domique Swain, into both bar stool johns and Nancy Drew.
But the apparent main attraction of The Girl From The Naked Eye is not the girl eye candy in question, but rather the testosterone drenched, guy on guy martial arts beat down peppering the underwhelming plot, however racy. And one Oldboy derivative kickbutt orgy that is so ludicrous, it’s almost funny.
